Saturday Snippet: Vanilla Ride by Joe Lansdale

I picked up a copy of Vanilla Ride by Joe Lansdale this afternoon and boy am I looking forward to reading it. Hap Collins and Leonard Pine are two of my favourite characters. If you haven't tried one of their stories then make haste to your nearest store or fire up Amazon, Book Depository, or whoever you use and get your mitts on one. The man sure can write. Here's the opening few lines of Vanilla Ride.

I hadn't been shot at in a while, and no-one had hit me in the head for a whole month or two. It was kind of a record, and I was starting to feel special.

Brett and I were upstairs in our little rented house, lying in bed, breathing hard, having just arrived at the finish line of a slow, sweet race that at times can seem like a competitive sport, but when played right, even when you're the last to arrive, can make you feel like a winner.

In that moment, life was good.

Brett sat up and fluffed her pillow behind her back and pushed her long bloodred hair to the side with one hand, shoved her chest forward in a way that made me feel mighty lucky, said, "I haven't had that much fun since I pistol-whipped a redheaded midget."

I'm only a few pages in, but the writing is tight, dry and witty, with great banter. A couple more lines.

Used to, you could leave your wallet on the porch swing and no one would bother it. These days, you left a cheese grater out, someone would steal the holes.

And:

Leonard said, "Man you could have at least put on pants. That robe is a little too peekaboo."

"My motto," I said, "is if you've got it, flaunt it."

"What you're flauntin' is enough to make a man turn a gun on himself," Leonard said.